I chased my homeless friend from my house

As I have mentioned in this post, I do not like aid much and so basically, I do not like it when people do not want to work for their upkeep.

Jean loses her job

I had a friend I met at church, Jean.  She was a maid and worked for one of our church mates.  One day Jean asked to move in with me.  She said her boss’  husband had been making passes at her and threatened to fire her if she continued to refuse his demands.  Jean respected her boss and decided to resign but had nowhere to go, hence she ended up at my door step.  I respected Jean for standing for her beliefs even in the face of homeless and joblessness.

A new job for Jean?

Jean came at the right time because a friend of mine, Liz, had just told me that her sister needed a maid immediately.  I made an appointment for Liz’s sister to meet Jean the very following day at 6.00 pm.  When I got home after 6.00 pm Liz’s sister was there but Jean was nowhere to be found.  I made another appointment for the following day again at the same time.  When Jean came home she said transport had been a problem and I said she could have her meeting the following day.  The next day Jean was nowhere to be seen again and Liz’s sister said Jean should go now to her house for the meeting.

Jean does not want another job

Late that evening while I was waiting for Jean to come back, my maid (Irene) told me apologetically that she did not want to be a tattletale but she did not want neither Liz’s sister or myself to waste our time.  Apparently, Jean had told Irene that she did not want to get another job.  Instead, she just wanted to go to Bible school in another few months and then go on into ministry.  I could not believe what I was hearing.

Jean came home very late and she did not have an excuse for missing her appointment other than that the prayer meeting had run too long.  I asked her about the Bible school issue and she confirmed that she did not want to work but to go to bible school in six months.  She also said that she would spend her time preparing for her class to start.  When I asked where she would be staying she said she would stay with me.

I went mad! Here I was – working hard to put food on my table and a roof over my head.  My elderly parents also worked hard on their plot of land and did not ask me for anything, and here was an able bodied young woman who expected me to take care of her.  As an aspiring Bible student, she definitely knew the verse that says “By the sweat of your brow will you eat bread” (Genesis 3:19). I definitely was not ready to help her break the Lord’s Word by encouraging her laziness.

Leave my house, Jean!

I then said to her “You have to leave my house within seven days.  I can not take care of an adult who does not want to work.”  Needless to say, Jean was shocked.  I had wanted to tell her to leave that very night, but thought that was too harsh.  I wondered whether Jean had told me the truth about her boss’ husband.  I wondered about every other thing she had told me.  Anyway, Jean left within a couple of days and I did not ask where she was going.  I doubt that the people she moved to would have allowed her to just sit at home doing nothing.

Jean gets a job

Jean never went to Bible School but got another job.  She had to since she was a widow and had a son who lived with her mother that she needed to take care of.  I think Jean had thought that I would let her lounge at home praying while I went to work.  I had seen some church mates who were professional loafers and moved from house to house being looked after.  I am not saying we should not help each other when one is down.  I have been down before and friends helped me, but what I do not agree with this is encouraging laziness.  Surprisingly, Jane and I remained very good friends though we did not mentioned the little incident.

Have you had to deal with a similar issue?  How did you handle the problem?

5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. jesusknowsmyname
    Dec 22, 2014 @ 22:47:23

    I loved how you presented that Bible verse to her. My husband said years ago he attended a church where a young family were always mooching (accepting handouts) from the other church members. The husband would not work. I don’t know what the outcome was, but I imagine the handouts eventually ended. You did do the correct thing, and you were very gracious.


  2. Kate Loveton
    Dec 18, 2014 @ 03:55:38

    You did the right thing. Even if she wished to further her studies, she could have still obtained a job. You handled it with grace.


  3. Pride in Photos Photography
    Dec 17, 2014 @ 15:49:44

    Tough love is never easy. Merry Christmas to you and your family.


  4. kay ~ lifestylevoices.com
    Dec 16, 2014 @ 18:07:42

    Wow, that was an amazing story. You were really nice to let her stay with you and then give her 7 days to leave. I don’t think many would have done the same. 🙂


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